Confrontation: You Attract What You Avoid
Confrontation is unavoidable. And if you are actively avoiding it, unbeknownst to you, you are inviting more of it into your life. It’s karma. Let me break it down for you.
Healthy confrontation is inevitable. What separates all of us is those who are avoidant and those who are not. For those of us who want to have a conversation, we understand the naturalness of it all. We don’t necessarily love it or actively seek it out, and yet we fully comprehend that we won’t get along with everyone every second of every day or agree on every topic. That’s not normal. We may agree to disagree. By reaching out to engage in a conversation to clarify the confrontation, we are showing a sign of maturity. We want to put down any swords and rationally discuss where we are at odds.
By confronting someone you are also allowing for all the chips to be on the table. Whether or not they respond and are willing to engage in a conversation is on them. You just have to understand that their response is not in your control. Only you can control putting those chips on the table, or not. Not of course you want to make sure you are picking your battles wisely. If you feed off confrontation I would encourage you to find a Therapist if you aren’t already seeing one. Of if your child is constantly picking fights, consider hiring a Therapeutic Consultant to help them find peace. If you haven’t read The Anatomy of Peace, I highly encourage you to do so. The applicability to anyone reading this is high.
In attempting to smooth over any discord, all people associated may show respect. To be brave enough to approach confrontation head-on is worthy of respect. Confrontation is uncomfortable, even if it’s a simple misunderstanding. It’s way easier to avoid any resolution, but as discussed in this title by doing so you are putting out into the universe to invite other confrontations.
Where you need to be careful is not coming across as aggressive. For someone who is actively avoiding confrontation, being approached by the other person can come across negatively. If that happens, it’s only because of a significant miscommunication. In that case, I would encourage the person who is assertively reaching out to continue to do so in a mature, and rational manner. You can only control your own actions. If you reach out multiple times with no response from the other party, it’s okay at some point to just say you’ve put the ball in their court. You’ll sleep well at night because you know you aren’t avoiding confrontation. In that case, you aren’t inviting it into your life. You’ll just need to be kind and empathetic for when, not if, the other person comes to you to dispel the miscommunication. At some point they will get tired of inviting all the confrontation in their life and will become brave enough themselves to assert a discussion to put away any swords.
For questions and comments contact Joanna at 970-218-9958 or via email.
