Legal Considerations for Parents of Young Adults during a Formal Eviction
Ideally, it doesn’t come to this. If you created a co-living agreement proactively before your young adult moved in, then chances are you provided scaffolding that allowed them to not get stuck and eventually launch. Additionally, your home environment was likely harmonious. If for some reason your young adult didn’t uphold the agreement and you didn’t uphold your boundaries, you may find yourself trapped in your own home. In an effort to not be dealing with a 30+ year old living at home, unemployed, not contributing to the household, and with no transition plan in sight - let’s discuss the legal process. It’s better to know this now and avoid having to go through this.
Navigating the legal eviction of an adult child is a painful process, but treating it with the strictness of a professional landlord-tenant relationship protects you legally and provides unambiguous boundaries. Once informal agreements break down, relying on formal legal channels ensures the process remains binding and enforceable. Here are some key legal considerations:
Establishing Tenant Status: Within your state you need to understand if this is legally considered tenant-at-will, or licensee. Even if they are family members, aren’t paying rent or contributing to utility bills, and there isn’t a written lease, there will be a status of classification. They hold legal occupancy rights when they get mail at your address, their belongings are there, and they consider your house their primary residence. You cannot simply change the locks, pack up their belongings putting them outside, or cut off the utilities. Technically this is an illegal “self-help eviction” which can result in civil fines or even a court order that requires you allow them back into your home. Eek!
Adhering to Local and State Notice Periods: You must serve a legal Notice to Vacate or Notice to Quit. This is before you can file a formal lawsuit. A general 30-day notice period is required, though it is state dependent. The Notice needs to include in writing their full legal name, specify the exact address, explicitly state that their occupancy is being terminated, and provide a vacate-by date.
Strict Rules of Service: A notice is only legally valid if served according to your state’s specific civil procedure rules. Methods for delivery include hand-delivering the document directly to your adult child, sending via certified mail with return receipt requested, or hiring a professional process server to hand-deliver the notice. Please consult with a local Landlord-Tenant Attorney.
Here is what the Legal Process could look like:
Serve the Notice to Vacate. If they move out but the Move-out date, then nothing further happens.
If they refuse to move out, then File Unlawful Detainer (essentially an Eviction Lawsuit). This will be preceded by a Court Hearing which your child will receive a summons to appear.
Attend Court Hearing. Bring all relevant documentation to the hearing. This could include: property deed in your name, copy of the Notice to Vacate, written co-living agreement or documentation showing non-compliance. If the Judge rules in your favor, they will issue a Judgement for Possession and a formal Writ of Possession. Essentially, your adult child is now required to move out.
If your adult child still refuses to leave after the court order expires, you can personally deliver the Writ of Possession to the local Sheriff’s or Police Department. Because the move-out is a court decision, only law enforcement has the legal authority to physically remove an occupant and lock them out of the premises. Whatever you do, DO NOT insert yourself to physically remove your young adult.
After your adult child is remove by law enforcement, if they return to your home uninvited they could end up with more legal consequences. Examples of this include: Criminal Trespass, Breaking & Entering (Burglary), Vandalism (Criminal Mischief), or Grand or Petty Theft. This doesn’t include any legal issues that pertain to Harassment, Battery or Domestic Violence, and Violation of a Protection Order (if you file a restraining order).
This is a lot to take in. No parent ever dreams of having to involve the court system to get their young adult to move out. It’s been done before though, and if you are proactive early on it won’t ever have to get to this point. We discuss boundaries all the time, but the one thing that stands above the rest if your own emotional wellbeing. If your young adult is taking advantage of you when they’re 19, you’re only kidding yourself that it will change by the time they’re 29 - unless you stand up for yourself. Work with a Parent Coach, an Individual Therapist, and if you are married, make sure you and your spouse are seeing a couples therapist. It takes a village!
For questions or comments contact Joanna.
