Defer and Mature

As a parent, if you identify that your 18 year-old-child is immature, please note that solely “going off to college” will not be the catalyst of growing up.  If you are a recently graduated high school student and you are having second guesses about college, know that is totally okay.  Well all need to trust our guts.  If you see it, if you smell it, if you taste it… it still is.  So, if you see that your child is unmotivated, nervous, unrealistic, will struggle with motivation or getting up on their own, then do not push them into going to school.  College can wait.

You can defer your admission.  That could be for one semester, or ideally one year.  By deferring, you are not throwing college away, but rather giving yourself some space to breath to be able to grow up before stepping foot on campus.  This is not an opportunity for you to push-back the inevitable, but rather supplant your college enrollment dreams by filling your time with opportunities for growth.

Domestic opportunities exist.  Some international opportunities still exist.  You have to anticipate your own health and access to healthcare, whereas that may not have been a priority before.  These are opportunities though that will provide space for you to live away from home, be employed, learn to cook, travel, meet new friends, troubleshoot conflict and communication, and flush out your next step in life.  By deferring college to do this, you are giving yourself (or your child) the biggest gift.  Life is learning!

If you see yourself as immature or not ready for college, consider deferment.  Maybe by the time you complete your gap experience you will discover that you want to explore a completely different post-secondary track.  You would never have gotten there, especially that fast, had it not been for your decision to defer to participate in an alternative opportunity.

There is nothing wrong with going against the herd!  

For questions or comments contact Joanna.