Self-Care is not Selfish
I’m going to hang my hat on this topic being why so many people struggle. Adolescents, young adults, and even parents don’t take the necessarily time for themselves because ultimately, they view acts of self-care as selfish. There is most likely a feeling of guilt associated with it, which never helps anyone take better care of themselves. Let’s look at how we can view self-care differently.
With it being the start of the new year, people often employ efforts to try to exercise, lose weight, quit smoking or drinking, start a new hobby, or get organized. It’s all in good faith, but realistically we know that most people will fizzle out from following through. Why? Because we get overwhelmed, we lean back on old habits, and establishing a new routine takes discipline and dedication. If you have people around you that require caretaking, it’s even easier to let go of what you need for yourself.
Let me remind you the true definition of what it means to be selfish:
/ˈselfiSH/
adjective
1. (of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.
Synonyms include egocentric, self-centered, self-absorbed, self-serving, thoughtless, and uncaring.
Woof.
In reading that, it’s no wonder no one wants to follow through with self-care. The association with self-care seems extremely negative and unflattering. In all serious though, how can you expect to take care of someone else if you can’t take care of yourself? Or if you aren’t fully well enough to care for someone else, how do you expect that you’ll have time to get better yourself?
You may also be asking for me to clarify “self-care.” Happily! Some ways to taking care of yourself include: getting exercise, saying “no” to others, eating healthy, making sleep mandatory, getting outside, being around pets, taking a personal vacation, or reading self-help books. That’s just to name a few. The idea is that you are taking care of yourself so you aren’t overwhelmed, stretched thin, exhausted, feeling lethargic, or unhappy. A lot can change in a short amount of time if you prioritize your own self-care.
Let’s put aside the nasty connotations that are associated with the idea of self-care being selfish. It’s truly not selfish to prioritize your own well-being. It’s necessary for your overall wellbeing. If someone wants to see it as selfish, let them. If you view your self-care prioritization in a positive light, then others will eventually come around to your perspective. If they still refuse to consider it anything other than selfish, be proud of yourself for selfishly caring for yourself!
For questions or comments contact Joanna.
